"Is anyone here a marine biologist?"
"Jerry...just remember...it's not a lie...if you believe it."
"So that Jane Mansfield had some big breasts"
"You're such a bad boy...is that your orthopedic back pillow?"
"Jerry, it's Frank Costanza...Mr. Steinbrenner's here...George is dead...call me back."
"I said milky white!"
"...So who's having sex with the rooster?!?"
"June 14th, 1987, we were enjoying a beautiful day at Shea until a crucial error cost the mets the game"
"Cheap fabric and dim lighting, that's how you move merchandise."
"I mentioned the bisque"
"I'm at the corner of 1st and 1st...I must be at the nexus of the universe"
"George is getting upset"
"You kept making all the stops?"..."Well people kept ringing the bell!"
"It's like a sauna in here"
"who told you to put the balm on?"
"I had a PONY!"
"I'm out there Jerry, and I'm loving every minute of it!"
"Hey Puddy, can you help me install a garbage disposal in my bathtub?"
"It's a Twix, they're all Twix. It was a setup, a setup I tell ya and you ruined it. You've all screwed me again"
"This took you an hour?"
"What is this? A profalctic WRAPPER!?"
"I once told a woman i coined the phrase 'pardon my french'"
"My name is George, I'm unemployed, and I live with my parents"
"Adjacent to refuse is still refuse"
"My neck is one big gargatuan monkey fist "
"A young girl's strange erotic journey from Milan to Minsk."
"No smell, no tell, Scotch."
" The sea was angry that day my friends, like an old man trying to return soup at a deli."
"Have you seen a tall, lanky doofus with hair like the Bride of Frankenstein?"
"SO LET HIM HAVE BANANAS ON THE SIDE!"
"When you look annoyed all the time, people think that you're busy."
"We feel that Mr. Kramer projects a rugged masculinity...Rugged? The man's a goblin."
"Another game for MILOS!!!"
"Hey, MAIL BLOWS, pass it on."
"That Michael Jordan is so phony"
"So thats one tuck...And one no tuck"
"Dijon Jerry, Dijon!"
"You're a rabid anti-dentite!"
"You ask me to get a pair of underwear, Im back in 10 seconds"
"My friend Jay Remenschnieder eats horse all the time!"
"Jerry, its 3 am and i'm standing at a cockfight...what am i holding on to?"
"Just remember...when you control the mail...you control...INFORMATION!"